Oh Martha... I don't know what to say! How many of us would stand up to the harshness of our own judgements on ourselves, or those of the people who've done us no good?
I'm sorry, I'll read again and try to come up with something more helpful. Despair can be OK, I've discovered, you can sit with it for a bit...
I've been in a fog for at least two years, ever since I filed for divorce. Truth is, I think most of my marriage was a fog. I just didn't get it until right before I filed.
I don't want you (or anyone else) to feel sorry for me, dear friend. I will survive this episode in my growing up, just as I have others. I didn't want to come across as a whiner, but I probably have. I know full well that, in the greater picture, I live better than at least half the people on this planet.
Most of my troubles have come from my not paying attention to what was happening to my life. I have some difficult choices to make now to get back on the right track, and I'm probably -- knowing me -- going to be pissing and moaning about it all the way. But it will be okay in the end.
It's about time I grew up, don't you think?
I thank you for your kind thoughts, Lucy. That's the best help anyone can provide. The rest is up to me.
Somehow I don't want the blogosphere to be the place that you share these things with us. They are so personal, yet so real. Everyone can have thoughts and ideas like this strike them, few mention them to others except really close friends. I admire you for sharing and say Thank you as your words and experiences make us take a look at ourselves. Surely I hope I'm not like Ex-B! You show strength and courage. You are a remarkable woman. I am proud and honored to know you. And I love it when you use the "F" word!
I hope what I've written hasn't offended you. Certainly, that wasn't my intention. Maybe this sort of thinking out loud isn't appropriate here. I do have another blog I write, so I will move this post over there.
4 comments:
Oh Martha... I don't know what to say! How many of us would stand up to the harshness of our own judgements on ourselves, or those of the people who've done us no good?
I'm sorry, I'll read again and try to come up with something more helpful. Despair can be OK, I've discovered, you can sit with it for a bit...
Much love, and admiration as ever.
xxx
Lucy:
I've been in a fog for at least two years, ever since I filed for divorce. Truth is, I think most of my marriage was a fog. I just didn't get it until right before I filed.
I don't want you (or anyone else) to feel sorry for me, dear friend. I will survive this episode in my growing up, just as I have others. I didn't want to come across as a whiner, but I probably have. I know full well that, in the greater picture, I live better than at least half the people on this planet.
Most of my troubles have come from my not paying attention to what was happening to my life. I have some difficult choices to make now to get back on the right track, and I'm probably -- knowing me -- going to be pissing and moaning about it all the way. But it will be okay in the end.
It's about time I grew up, don't you think?
I thank you for your kind thoughts, Lucy. That's the best help anyone can provide. The rest is up to me.
Hugs and kisses to you, too.
:)
Somehow I don't want the blogosphere to be the place that you share these things with us. They are so personal, yet so real. Everyone can have thoughts and ideas like this strike them, few mention them to others except really close friends. I admire you for sharing and say Thank you as your words and experiences make us take a look at ourselves. Surely I hope I'm not like Ex-B!
You show strength and courage. You are a remarkable woman. I am proud and honored to know you. And I love it when you use the "F" word!
Peace.
Spadoman:
I hope what I've written hasn't offended you. Certainly, that wasn't my intention. Maybe this sort of thinking out loud isn't appropriate here. I do have another blog I write, so I will move this post over there.
Peace be with you, too.
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